


boycott love (what a match!)

by Murf1307



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Additional Pairings in Notes, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 09:46:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13567995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Murf1307/pseuds/Murf1307
Summary: A story about outliers and tattoos.





	boycott love (what a match!)

**Author's Note:**

> Fic contains references to: Zack/Cloud, Cloud/Aerith, and Barret/Myrna.

Cloud Strife’s back, unknown to most people, is a constellation of soulmate tattoos. He doesn’t think about them often, doesn’t see them because of where they are; for him, they’re a non-issue.

After all, whoever his soulmates are, they deserve someone less damaged — if they’re each other’s soulmates, too, then at least they’ll have each other.

Across his shoulders, a smattering of bright blue splotches mimic bullet holes; woven through them is a long pink ribbon that curls around and down to the knob of his right hip. He thinks of it, briefly, when he meets Aerith, but ignores the idea as much as he can. Again, the timing isn’t right, and the ribbon could mean anything, couldn’t it?

Most of his back, though, is a wash of green and orange, like Mako mixed with fire. Up his spine lays a dark-skinned right hand and forearm, and that is an obvious one from the moment he meets Barret Wallace and his missing right hand.

Tifa’s seen his back, and she knows. She introduced them, after all, and Cloud can’t help but think she’s hoping he’ll do something.

He feels bad about disappointing her, but he _can’t_.

So he doesn’t.

 

* * *

 

Barret has two tattoos on the inside of his thigh. He’s grateful for that, at least, that they are where they are.

Myrna always said he was going to be special, and he thinks it made her feel less sad about her failing health. She wouldn’t be leaving him alone when she finally passed, and that was comforting to her.

That tattoo related to her is a fragile blue rose, springing up from a bed of coal. Something so beautiful coming out of Corel could only mean her, and the blue bracelet tattoo on her left wrist, marked with the same roses, sealed the deal. He used to trace it at her bedside, and when they made love, and she would always laugh gently because it tickled when he touched the inside of her wrist.

But Corel’s burned now, and that leaves the other tattoo.

Dark, sullen clouds and lightning rendered in green and gold, illuminating a sword stabbed into the ground. Where Myrna’s tattoo curves around his upper thigh like a garter, the other one takes up most of the space above his knee.

When he meets Cloud Strife, he decides, immediately, that he’d rather be alone.

 

* * *

 

A monster in Shinra Manor reveals Cloud’s back in all its symbolic and literal details when it catches him with its claws from behind. He falls forward, bleeding, his shirt in tatters.

His first thought is that he shouldn’t have brought Barret with him to search for Sephiroth, here, because now he’ll _know_.

If he didn’t already.

And sure, Cloud’s fine with how things are. He may have realized some things along the way, about himself and about Barret and the things they have in common.

But the fact remains: if Barret knows, and has done nothing, that’s as good as a rejection, and a more gentle rejection than Cloud would have expected or hoped for. He struggles to his feet as if nothing had happened and turns, aiming to get his own hit in on the monster.

Barret’s already killed it, his gun-arm pressed against its head. Tifa notices Cloud watching, and gives him a _look_.

It reminds Cloud eerily of his mother, the way she’d always wanted him to find someone who would “take care” of him, and her hopes that his tattoos meant someone would.

As Barret steps back from the monster carcass, Cloud contemplates the irony.

 

* * *

 

So, Cloud isn’t really what Barret thought he was.

That much, Barret’s figured out in the weeks since they escaped Midgar. It pulls at him, how his instinctive reaction hadn’t been right, because his instincts usually are.

He caught a glimpse of Cloud’s tattoos when Cloud went down in Shinra Manor, and more than a glimpse as they all kept going, seeking out Sephiroth and finding him in the basement. They don’t have any bandages, and Cloud heals quicker than normal anyway, so they don’t use any materia for now.

And that means that Barret can see his own right arm on Cloud’s back as they’re leaving. Thankfully, it’s summer, and not too cold, but part of him wishes Cloud would cover up already.

When they get back to the inn, Cloud goes upstairs to do that, and Tifa sits down on a chair in the front of the inn. She’s watching Barret curiously.

He glares at her. “What?”

“So?” Her voice is expectant, and normally, Barret would appreciate that.

“So what?”

She shakes her head. “You’re both so _stubborn_.”

Barret can’t help but think that it’s because they have to be. It’s the only way either of them has survived until now: sheer stubbornness.

He sits down across from her, sighing. This is all too complicated, and right now, they all have enough on their plates. Thinking about his non-relationship with his soulmate should be the last thing on his mind.

 

* * *

 

Cloud stays up in the top floor of the inn for longer than necessary. Twisting around in a mirror, he looks at his back, at the arm tattooed there, and exhales before he puts another shirt on.

Barret knows for sure now. That much is obvious.

Cloud thinks he knows better than to hope for anything to come of this. They’re too different, and Cloud’s still too damaged to promise anyone anything.

Hell, Barret has a _daughter_. If they all live through this, and they — shit, Cloud doesn’t know how to be a parent. He barely knows how to be a _person_. He can’t subject them to his issues, the holes in his memory, the five years of his life he can’t remember at all.

But part of him wants to, selfishly.

Part of him thinks of Barret at Cosmo Canyon, and how at ease Barret looked there, talking about the history of AVALANCHE and the Planet and protecting it. Making the world better for the future.

Cloud admires that. Cloud thinks, that given time, he could love that.

And that scares him, though he isn’t quite sure why.

 

* * *

 

Something’s different now. Barret can’t deny that. There’s something different about Cloud, since Shinra Manor. He’s even quieter, more pensive than before, and Barret realizes that it —

It means something, that Barret’s noticed, that it’s taken up so much space in his head, the fact that Cloud’s upset.

Traveling to Mt. Nibel, Barret wants to take Cloud aside, make sure he’s doing alright, but he can’t. That’s not how they’ve ever been with each other, and he’s pretty sure that’s not what Cloud would want, anyway.

After all, Cloud knows everything about him now. Shit, Cloud deserves better than that, and Barret won’t blame him for knowing that, and acting accordingly.

But, there’s these _moments_ , moments when Barret catches himself thinking about how happy Marlene would be to have another dad, how good Cloud’s been with her in the little amount of time they’ve interacted. He thinks about that flower he gave her, back in Midgar.

Sure, Cloud’s got issues. But so does Barret, and so far, he hopes he’s done okay.

It’s not even just imagining Cloud as Marlene’s other parent, either. It’s the memory of Cloud in Cosmo Canyon, in the room behind the Weapons shop, genuinely interested in the history of AVALANCHE; and before that, in Corel Prison, the way that Cloud was willing to fight Dyne alongside him, even though it was Barret’s fight.

So, he might be a little in love with his soulmate.

Just his luck.

 

* * *

 

After they make their way down the coast from Rocket Town, Cloud starts to feel more and more dissatisfied with the way things are. He sits in their encampment late one night, sharpening his sword.

Their latest addition to the party, Vincent, doesn’t sleep, ironically. He’s some kind of vampire monster, which is odd, but Cloud can mostly ignore it. As it stands, that makes Vincent the perfect night guard for when the party camps on the road.

Cloud glances from Vincent over toward Barret, who sleeps curled up on his side. A flash of an image crosses his mind — himself, wrapped up with Barret. Asleep, comfortable, feeling... _good_ , maybe, for once. It makes something in his chest ache, puts a lump in his throat, because he knows he can’t have that. He can’t even ask for it — he wouldn’t dare.

So, he just keeps sharpening his sword and tries not to think about it.

 

* * *

 

Now that he knows that he has actual feelings for Cloud, things get a little more complicated for Barret. He’s doing a lot of thinking, now, in between all the fighting — what is the future going to be like when they see the other side of this?

He wants Cloud in his life. He wants to get to know who Cloud is when the fighting’s all over. He wants to know — though he thinks he already does — how good Cloud might be with Marlene, and what that life might look like. It’s a warm thought, and part of him just wants to sit with it a while in his chest.

In the Ghost Mansion at the Gold Saucer, as Cloud explains the plan, Barret can’t help but see something else in Cloud, too, maybe for the first time: a leader.

Cloud may not be sure about much, but Barret’s starting to think that might just be the world’s way of keeping Cloud from taking over the world, or something. Because when he does know what he’s doing, he can be almost damn inspirational.

Heading up to his hotel room, Barret can’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, he ought to try doing something about all of this.

Maybe, maybe it’s his turn to take the lead in _this_ , since Cloud’s taken the lead in the quest.

He exhales, and starts to plan.

 

* * *

 

Cloud watches the dark and stormy night outside his window, admittedly brooding a little. Sephiroth is out there, and he’s going to destroy everything he hates in his quest to obtain the Promised Land.

That’s the thing they all need to focus on; stopping him, and then stopping Shinra, because Cloud’s sure now that he is in this to save the Planet.

He wonders how much of that has to do with Barret, but tries not to think about it.

Then, there’s a knock on his door. He turns, moving toward it, and calls, “Who is it?”

“It’s me.” Barret. Shit.

They haven’t been alone together in a long time, and Cloud’s not sure who’s responsible for that. “Come in?”

Barret walks in, and — he’s not wearing any of his gun arms. The stump is capped over, and Cloud isn’t sure why that is. He’s never seen Barret...dressed down, like this. Literally unarmed.

He’s not sure what it means.

“So,” Barret says, a little awkwardly. “Was thinkin’ about taking a walk. You wanna join me?”

Cloud pauses for a moment, then nods. “Uh, sure.”

Barret nods, and turns, still in the doorway. Cloud follows, not entirely sure where this is going, though he can’t help the warm flush of hope in his chest, much as he tries to push it down.

 

* * *

 

Barret makes sure he stands on Cloud’s left side as they walk. He runs on impulse a lot of the time, and he knows it. The last thing he needs is to just grab Cloud’s hand in a public place; Cloud might not want that, and who knows what other people will think?

So they walk, quietly, up around Wonder Square and Battle Square, and then someone on the Saucer staff suggests they go see the show in Event Square.

“Congratulations, you’re our 100th — “ Another staff member says, the sentence half out of her mouth before she realizes they’re both men. “Oh, you’re not, I’m sorry.” She shifts away a little, wincing at what she thinks is a mistake.

And really, isn’t it?

Cloud’s blushing, Barret notices, as they leave Event Square, and he’s resolutely staring forward, as if to avoid the idea of them being a couple.

It makes Barret’s chest ache. He exhales. “Well, that coulda gone better,” he says, because yeah, it could have. Part of him hates the fact that people assume things like that lady did. Another part of him hates the fact that she’s technically right.

Cloud swallows. “Yeah, kinda awkward.” He looks around at the portholes to the different squares. “Uh, what now?”

Barret looks at him, and decides, screw it, he didn’t knock on Cloud’s door tonight only to _not deal_ with this thing between them. He takes a breath. “Well, maybe we oughtta find someplace private?”

“Oh, uh, okay.” Cloud’s flush darkens, and his eyes fly to the map. “There’s a cable-car ride around the Saucer. Probably pretty private?”

Neither one of them is really much for talking, so they’re quiet as they head down to the loading dock.

Barret can only hope this goes all right.

 

* * *

 

Cloud may have underthought the whole cable-car idea.

Now that they’re seated, across from each other in the rickety-feeling wooden car, Cloud’s knees are pressed right up against Barret’s, and he can’t avoid that point of contact even as he looks out into the night, part of him trying to ignore this conversation if he can.

He knows he can’t though, so, when Barret shifts a little, he looks back at him.

“So. Your tattoos,” Barret opens, and he looks a little...nervous. Cloud’s not sure he’s ever seen Barret nervous before.

“Yeah. They’re — they’re soulmate marks.” He takes a deep breath. “I think...I think they might mean three soulmates.”

Barret nods. “I’ve got two.”

“Myrna?” Cloud asks, because Barret doesn’t talk about his wife much, but it’s clear the loss, amidst everything else, really hurt him.

“Yeah. Myrna.” He takes a breath, and says, quietly, “And you.”

Cloud swallows. “Okay.”

Barret looks out the window, and that’s when the fireworks show starts. Cloud doesn’t know where this conversation’s supposed to go next, so he just sits there and waits for Barret’s attention to come back to him.

It does, pretty soon. Barret looks at him again, carefully. “The ribbon’s Aerith, ain’t it?”

“Probably,” Cloud says, his exhale a little shaky. “I — I don’t want her to know.” He closes his eyes. “I didn’t want anyone to know.”

Silence, except for the fireworks, for a long, long moment. Then, quietly, Barret asks, “Who do you think those blue splotches are for?”

Cloud shrugs, opening his eyes. “I think I forgot.”

“So somebody someday might come waltzin’ in like they own the place?” Barret asks, frowning a little.

There’s a heavy weight in Cloud’s stomach. “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

“Huh.” Barret looks out the window. “Surprised you’re not interested in Aerith. She’s a good looking woman.”

Cloud shrugs. “I...I can’t say I don’t love her,” he says. “It’s...it’s complicated. Something in me says I should, and something else won’t let me.”

Barret shakes his head. “Guess that leaves you and me, then,” he says, ominously.

“Yeah, guess it does.”

 

* * *

 

Barret sometimes hates that there are others. Like right now, alone in a wooden cable-car with Cloud, talking about Aerith and some mystery person. Cloud’s all Barret has now, and Barret wants to be _with_ him.

He knows he shouldn’t feel like he’s got a claim on him, just because his arm’s written on Cloud’s back. Especially not when it’s not the only mark there.

“Marlene likes you,” he offers, hoping that maybe, maybe this will get across what he means.

Cloud shrugs, a little flushed. “She’s a good kid.”

Barret’s chest warms. “Yeah, she is.” He glances out at the fireworks. “She’d love this.”

“...I bought the lifetime pass, so. Maybe next year?”

Barret blinks at Cloud in surprise. “You’d wanna —?”

Cloud nods, almost too fast. “Yeah, of course. If we live through this, yeah.”

Barret intends to, with a promise like that. He nods. “Alright, then. Marlene’ll be excited about that, for sure.”

“Hope so.” Cloud smiles, just a little, for the first time all evening.

 

* * *

 

When the ride is over, Cloud’s not sure what to do. He’s a little drained, sure, but at the same time, there’s a fidgeting, nervous restlessness under his skin.

“Wanna head back to the hotel?” Barret asks, faux-casual.

“Maybe, yeah,” Cloud says. He notices that this time, Barret’s on his right side. His throat tightens, because this is a chance to maybe make things a little clearer, right?

He reaches out and holds Barret’s hand.

Barret tenses, then squeezes Cloud’s hand, looking down at him. “You sure about this?”

“Yeah,” Cloud says, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

When Barret smiles at him, it feels almost like the fireworks are still going on.


End file.
